Is it Love ? Is it Lust ? Is it a Lot !!

I remember I was already 3 years old in Bangalore and having 3 years of experience in my career I saw her for the first time. I felt like I have never seen such a beautiful girl in my life. I felt little bad cause the attire was of course a bridal one ! Whatever I never cared I lost my self watching the small, the beautiful eyes. Mean while I started making my eyes little smaller and while watching her my lips formed a wave, made a curve and I started smiling at her. Thought wow "Eyes Have it". But When I smiled I realized Her smile is more attractive than her eyes even ! Thinly built a perfect to her face with a lighter smile she was looking great and perfect. And my smile was not perfect though I smiled after a long time. I continued watching her smile and searched for her lively picture. I found it. I played it and she was with the 'Langa Voni' and it was perfect for her personality. She looked homely and naughty too. I saw her eyes talking and smiles making me more than happier ever. It was the day I saw her whole day till evening. I forgot the worries I had, I forgot my misunderstanding with the God.

It's been the day I saw her, I just started smiling. I started smiling from the heart again. Whenever I have a fight with my health and terrible tired out from office or mind goes back to my childhood memories, I miss the beautiful and happier side of life, I sit quite at my home alone, my friends out for movies or with their girlfriends leaving me, I opened the same picture and live-pictures and have it in my eyes, smiled and entertained myself. I started comparing every girl I see, I look for the same eyes and same lips and same smile and some of their acts if they resembles her. Its the day I heard the song she danced I started loving Telugu and Telugu songs too. I just loved the Telugu culture too. I was overwhelmed at my friends marriage at Hyderabad. I watched many Telugu Movies. When ever I could find a plot I spoke about her with my friends, more about Telugu movies, more about Telugu songs. I made a small favorite collection of Telugu video and mp3 too. I started watching and listening them most of my leisure time. Ahha no no I am not like the crazy cricket lovers. I just loved watching her smiling and it made me forget my pains and boredom.

No no its not that I remember her only when I am unhappy. I remember her when ever I can even now and its been almost 5 years. I spoke a lot about her with my girl friends too. Some get jealous cause they think I love her more then any one. One of my girl friends just hates her watching even ! and stopped listening Telugu songs too. So many friends pinged me asking who is she when I wished her this year on May 4th on her birthday in my GTalk status. I call few of my girl friends to watch her live when she appears in TV. I remember once I was at ooty I saw her from far, I got so exited but couldn't gather so much courage to face her. One of my girl friend msg/call me when she is live in TV or see her in TV program or in any movie, But I hate it when she is not with Mahesh or Siddharth. Some friends say me She is black in complexion ! I say I started loving it with a smile. Some friends say she is a drunkard. I say don't you drink too with a smile.

Some asks why do you so much crazy about her ? I answers I am not crazy I just adore her. I am passionate for her smile, eyes, her childish act in most of her act. I say I don't mind what she is in her personal life. But her smile makes me smile, her language tought me loving different cultures, her songs tought me listening songs from every language which i never understand, her dance made me enjoy every bit of music which doesn't have any language, her beauty tought me finding beauty everywhere and in everything. Her videos from Athadu, Varsham, Nuvvostanante Nenoddantana, Vinnaithaandi Varuvaayaa tought me finding happiness watching them again and again and how to enjoy being in the same profession, same place, with same friends and visiting same place again-n-again and finding new and exiting happiness every time I am with them or I visit them and every day I work in day today life. She has become a part of my life. I don't mind if I don't see her in my Real life or in future but I can't stop loving her and Can't think of Leaving her. Trisha is my best of the best friends so far and will be for ever.

We couldn't be better than best friends !

Rahul was a one man army for quite a longtime solving puzzles, analysis and design in his 30 years of career and struggles on relationships, friendship and personal, professional life. All of a sudden Rahul felt he was the saddest person in the whole world. He still couldn't solve many of his personal problems though he wanted and could solve others and make them happy. He still couldn't buy the sober doll for his mother who he wished the happiest mother ever. He still the same software engineer and till now no promotion. He still didn't own his own house yet. He still in his status of singleness of the youths life. He still carries the loan and borrowings of others.

Why ! He was looking for the answer He was restless though he solved the puzzle it took him very longtime which a smarter guy wouldn't take. He missed it again like he missed quite a good chunk of CAT score two years back for just the time gap. Whole night he was narrating and summerising the failures and success in his life where he went wrong and where he succeeded. He remembered his college days and also the days in profession. He remembered the persons and the personality who has impacted much in his life. He reminded few of his best friends Anand, Deepak, Devi, Pooja, Lavanya, Raj, Ketan. Few he chosen to be his best friends and few chosen him to be their best friends. Some more names Neeta, Narendra, Bhusan, Dillip were in the list of his friends too. He remembered the happiness he almost lost. He traversed many of his friendly messages from his good and best friends one by one.

Neeta : "Worrying doesn't reduce yesterday's sorrows but it empties todays strength". be happy for ever GN :)
Reshma : "Promises We break them sometimes, Memories: Break us sometimes". Have a Pleasant evening :)
Pooja : "When you fully trust a person without any doubt You finaly get 'One person for life' or 'A lesson for life'" Good Nit :-)

many more ..... good and bad but Rahul liked these messages most and kept reading them again and again some more he read again

Raj: "When you learn to attract girls, u'll realise what is luv,
When you learn to avoid gals, u'll realise wat is life"
Ketan: Be a friend like woman's bra 1. colorful 2. comfortable 3.stretchable 5.holding u tightly 6. never let
you down 7. always near heart :)" gn tc :)
Anand: 3 lines 2 sum up everything
I learnt abt LOVE: "it doesn't last"
I learnt abt PEOPLE: "they change fast"
I learnt abt LIFE: "it still moves on"

ofcourse Har ek friend jaruri hai yarr !!! after all they are our entertainer, they make us smile when we are sad and see these simple messages had given enough strength and smile to Rahul to start a lateral thinking.

Yes 7 years passed in his earnings life and it still goes on in the same way it used to 23 years back when he wasn't earning !. Lots of crest and tough crossed still the life boat is un-sunk and its just moves on in tandem with the life's busy momentum and responsibilities. Many people have changed some people he has forgotten and some have forgotten him too. Time didn't allow him to Love or be Loved. He still doesn't have any worry. He now has few very best friends and its the age, the busy life which made him to be like this. No he feels every person has this nightmare in their life. The more length they cross on the journey of life they tend to feel lonely and lonelier. That's the reason human has built society, family, wife, friends, close friends, best friends.

Yes he couldn't see Lavanya anymore neither in his messages nor in his day to day life but always wish happiness around her ! He knows it was she who cared him the most and stood as the best of the best friends ever. Who helped him in his struggling career and also laid her shoulder in every happy and sorrowful moments. He always felt it could be more than the best friendship she deserved but he didn't find anything for her more than in his dictionary. He knew She deserved more and when he let her marry and purposely made her out of his circles he was more happy than being sad. She deserved more than him and his friendship and he didn't want her to be so unlucky. She wouldn't be able to see his unstable personal and professional life. She would again come back with more help which Rahul always hates. He always wanted to be self sufficient and He needed time. He now thinks he still need time. But time always deceived him. He purposely lost the contact of Lavanya for quite many years to help himself. He let her sail her own boat of her married life. Yes she is successful and Rahul feels happy to hear all those from other friends. He knows She would forgive him anytime they meet again. He never hesitate to beg excuse from her anytime he meets her. Bhusan opened the door and ran the basin ohh it was 7 am morning.!! Rahul couldn't realise it whole night he was reading all these messages and thinking about the bad and good past. He gathered himself went to another room and locked himself to have a sleep.

Deepak came knocked the door, ohh it was 10am Rahul woke-up opened the door Bhusan left for interview locking the door from outside. Deepak: hey whats up man till now sleeping lets go we will go for shopping right !! Rahul couldn't escape it as it was planned already the day before Deepak's marriage day is near and they have to buy some bridal rings from D'Damas at meenakhi mall. He got ready Deepak and rahul started for Menakhi mall. Meenakhi mall D'Damas they entered inside. Rahul wished always when he would buy such expensive white gold chain and rings. He was just checking the price and guessing when he would be able to buy something for him. Or can he afford it anythime in future !! A set, necklace the sales man handed over to the front couple and said 2.64 Lakhs sir. The gentle man said you can pack it she liked it no more choice. Rahul felt uneasy but so happy for the lucky bride for such a gentleman. He wanted to see her and him. And suddenly a voice which was very known and familiar to Rahul was heard. "Rahul what r u doing here, I am so happy to see you with a nice smile and without any hesitation she introduced the gentleman this is Rahul and he is my husband". Rahul felt like he got all the happiness of his life to day. He got the message, He thanked God for making him so light of the yesterday's pain and heaviness. He couldn't stop and pulled Deepak's shoulder and introduced "She is Lavanya and he is her husband". Rahul was right and very happy and while talking he was lost in his own thought "We couldn't be better than best friends".

180 Days of True Lies

Main Protagonists :- Rahul, Nisha, Pooja, Neeta and many others true and lies

11.11.11 and 11pm night. what a coincidence so many msgs arrived at Rahul's Mobile ! Yes this was the day, it seems many people were waiting for the day for sure, so as Rahul. Morning also many people greeted Rahul for an auspicious day or new beginning. Rahul was surely looking positive for the coming days ahead. He was always right, right again and Nisha proved it again ! It was an endevour of allmost 60days, fruit was never so satisfactory or any great victory for Rahul. He knew it on completion he will be blamed more than he will achieve, he will be laughed more than praised, he will loose his dignity more than he earns, he will loose the trust more than he is deceived. But he had to do it for the sake up his future and peace in his life. Of-course Rahul has lost his many of his valuable properties in past few months.

It was an outstanding revelation by Nisha and Neeta was also in loop by Rahul. Neeta !! Yes she is Nisha's childhood friend. A good girl for sure who understands her human values and family values too. On the day after Diwali Nisha introduced her to Rahul and 15-20 minutes of talk was enough to understand her for Rahul. Nisha had to because Rahul had started avoiding her and noway that she could reach him more if she doesn't introduce a good abstract or a supporting actress. Nisha always use to say she is a good girl but easy to be fooled ! Rahul knows it already that always good people are fooled easily because they don't think complicated part of anything but believe others. But they always learn and learnt definitely from their mistakes which the smartest or people who think they are smart would never learn in their life. Nisha never could realize that she has been over confident from last 3-4 months and now heading for a new nightmare to begin without her knowledge and with her over confidence ! Rahul had thought of it already that Nisha is going to tell about her relation with Sanju in a different way though but so close to his right guess, otherwsie from Neeta anyway he will get to know sooner or later but she has to tell something in someway that he never would mind it again even though he gets to know later from someone else like Neeta.

176 days before Nisha came like storm to Rahuls life seeking a help. Rahul was always a guy who helped others and didn't hesitate to help Nisha this time. Nisha was just a common friend whom he met in Pooja's BDay Party. May be that day rahul couldn’t guess that this small introduction with Nisha will impact his life style in future. Pooja used to tell sometimes about Nisha's sorrowful journey of life and also crazy part of her life. Rahul has this personality that he hardly speak in a group and the same thing he repeated at the BDay party but he couldn't stop his bad habit of analyzing Nisha which concluded him of a girl who is very modern and stylish and cryptic and clever nature. Rahul couldn't stop himself helping Nisha but. Her cry was loud and louder than the Banglaore traffic that day. She was desperately looking for an emotional help. She met an accident with a scoundrel and a victim of eve teasing by her Boy friend whom she broke-up that day, which was reveled with her sobbing words. Rahul just couldn't avoid her listening and asked her to pass by his house which he guided over the phone. He consoled and gave a soothing and friendly hand to her and hoped that she will groom strength soon and bid a happy farewell later. She smiled and went home. Then the friendship began. He told it to pooja and pooja was quite happy with Rahuls help after-all Nisha was her crazy immature friend whom she always guided and she also said Nisha need help and he must help her overcoming her bad past. Rahul acknowledged.

Rahul guided Nisha and Nisha seemed to be following and showed her happyness and transformations. Slowly Rahul and Nisha became well friend. Meanwhile Nisha showed her love, affection and her care towards Rahul. Rahul was over careful this time for such a fast track relationship. He knows his struggling life and future and past, he couldn't accept her though he was pity he tried to convince her that he is not the right guy and he could be good friend not more. Nisha was restless she had to prove that her care was genuin. She did what ever she could do to prove her love and Rahul was unable to avoid because she was too weak to be convinced and he was unable to see her every day cry and sorrows she used to reveal. She used to update each and every status she is doing for him. Sometimes he use to analyse more and found that Nisha's over explanation seemed to be disturbing more and more. He was unable to handle when Nisha used to come running to meet him every weekend or in between, She started to insist him to meet her brotherly friends everytime she came to meet with a common cause. He had to say hi to them atleast to see a smile in her face cause he can't see a girls cry. Next time he meets Nisha he convinced her saying that he doesn't like to be a role model for other friends of her and she need not bring them along with her when she meet him. Nisha stopped. Rahul was unable to manage time between software engineer life and meeting Nisha every time he gets a little time for himself and for his friends. He avoided more but couldn't avoid more when Nisha asked him to visit temple every weekend. She sometimes used to go wild when Rahul denied of going to temple in her scooty. He never believes in going to temple every weekend. God is omnipresent and thats how he managed to be with him as always and he hardly visit temple. And when he told the samething to Nisha, She was unable to take it but cried more and Rahul couldn't see her crying again. She has stopped drinking and going to pub for him she said, she also prayed God for him. Ohh so much it was quite so much to prove her sincerity and caring from Gods nearer child.

Rahul was never convinced this time too as she didn't stop meeting her very close friend Chandan who was her table friend she used to tell. Around two month later Nisha said Chandan was engaged and going to marry and soon stopped talking about Chandan there after. Rahul didn't investigate. Nisha was restless and not convinced that Rahul cant be more than a friend afterall Rahul seems to be a one girl guy. She can't loose him for sure. In the mean while Rahul concluded he can't decide anything just for a 3 months of friendship for sure as he knew when he was out of station Nisha never bothered his where about and one day for a cause when Rahul wanted to talk to Nisha, her mobile was unanswered and later known to be left silent which she reveled on a late night message. He had to seek help from Pooja and Pooja used to be there always though she is married. Nisha was more stuburn She was unable to understand Rahuls personality and nature. She showed her ultra care but didn't try to understand him and his personality. Rahul started telling her that she should stop showing her over care and give sometime to understand him, that could be more helpful to her. He doesn't like meeting her every other day just for a walk to the temple. He recognized something wrong, He realizes Nisha's reaction was unbelievable at Meenakhi Mall while talking about his friends Arya's marriage with his beloved girl who eloped with her invisible old boy friend which made Rahul very confused. He warned him self ! He spoke to himself quite often at dinner table with friends. Friends good guessed and started teasing him calling him in the name of Nisha. After all Nisha was a common friend and he couldn't reveal anything but used to give his 1 million dollar smile. He didn't try to understand what his other friends started concluding about him and Nisha. It was quite obvious and friends return smile was making him more careful.

Rahul already felt restless and he also found that the more he argue and avoid Nisha, her wilderness would increase, he had to be friendly he had to be lenient. Rahul's friends smiled more at the dinner table. Rahul would never react and he would talk about marriage and business to avoid his return smile. Nisha started to hear Rahul again. The next weekend she met Rahul she hugged Rahul and expressed her genuine love with a kiss. Rahul hugged her tight and Nisha's expression was quite interesting but looked uneasy to rahul, he was not ready no he can't he gathered himself, he untied his ring of hands from her waist and pushed her far and said hope you understand me and I can't give a false impression to our holy friendship. Nisha was quite and left the room. She never tried the same again. She now never comes very often to meet him to his room but update him more of her doings and work in her company and how she recently met most of her childhood friends. She still says, she saw him in her dreams almost everyday. She still says 'Uddan Movie hero' is like you with a big smile. Her day starts with Rahul name and ends with Rahul name so boldly which really makes Rahul very much confused and sometimes wild.

Four months passed Nisha showed her sincerity as always by her words of emotions, sometimes with a cry and phone sms. By this time Rahul started singing and and murmuring the very best English songs of Enrique and Nicole which would be the best songs played in most of Bangalore pubs and clubs ! Rahul became weak in his talks and rude in his behaviors and also felt emotional while talking to his mom. He felt like he lost his smile ! He was never like this before. He believed he lost many of his natural properties and also loosing his valuable time. He doesn't talk practical now. He has become little broadminded then ever but too weak to help himself in his saddest time. He started analyzing his recent past being far and quite, how Nisha managed to convince when she didn't pick his call another whole day till 10 PM. Rahul got to know that she was not with her child hood friend Ritu. He was amazed that Ritu didn't know him even though Nisha and Rahul's friendship is so popular in Nisha's office. He started to be too cryptic to his own best friends. He didn't spoke to Pooja from last three months and four months is passed already with Nisha. He had to visit Nisha often to a park not let her come to his house anymore because Nisha's house was too far and her mother would be waitting for her return. He knows the pain of waiting for a beloved. Bearing her for two hour was quite difficult for him when Nisha accidentally used She and He together and Her and His with Sanju who used to be a childhood friend of her while talking in the park. Rahul didn't intervene but used to give smile when she does such mistakes. Now Nisha doesn't use She and Her with Sanju anymore and She also told that Sanju is her best friend whom she met when she met other her childhood friend on that day and they often go in his car for long rides but she always prefers to sit on the back seat. She also told  how she used to spend whole lots of time together in childhood days aside the railway tracks, schools, so funny moments with Neeta, Radha, Rekha, Anuj and others. Rahul smiles when Nisha used to smile after sharing each of her funny moments. At the same time he remembers how she used to go wild and acknowledged that she can't take it when he used to tell about his best female friends in earlier days of their friendships.

Rahul is more careful now in his guess and analysis and din't let Nisha know that he is guessing right but tried to give her hint teasing him in the name of her child hood friend Sanju. He tried his best to let Nisha know that he knows many incidents and many of her friends personally and she should stop explaining and updating more. He also hinted that she should stop showing her love towards him unnecessarily. Now Nisha couldn't stop reveling that she met Sanju at the same time when she met Rahul in a pub but it was just an accident and she never drank or drink. Since that day they are close friends and meet in groups and fight and fun with other child hood friends who never drinks or go to pub. Rahul smiled and nodded. Nisha gestures Rahul's belief. But Rahul couldn't stop analysing more and he was almost convinced that some day very near Nisha would tell a new adventure with her child hood friends surely and Rahul guessed it he was definite that the day was near.

Messages were so nicely narrated by Nisha like never before, all the messages Rahul knew the style of messages she writes and the way she express along with her hidden body language was so different today. One week back Nisha along with Sanju, Anuj, Mohan, Rekha, Radha and Naina and an unknown friend met in Mohan apartments and they planned for a disco in his big house of double bedroom and a hall Kitchen. Lights switched off, every one started drinking. Rahul was already prepared to hear this because he knew it already from quite a long time may be he was sure for this day on the first day which was around 176 days of their true and lies of  friendship. Nisha was concerned as she doesn't drink anymore and went to watch an animation movie in Mohan study room. Every one was her childhood friend so she felt secure and safe and was lost in her Movie. In the meanwhile the unknown fellow came and handed over a glass of sprite and asked her to come to the hall and join them dancing with the disco and loud music. All that he wanted to hear from Nisha is what Nisha is now writing it like a movie scene, so nicely articulated each message taking more longer than typing speed of a human hand as if she has become a writer today. She couldn't set her back to the movie cause the vodka mixed sprite was already into her body and mind. She danced a while and reminded of Rahul came back to study room again slept on a bed phone was ringing on her belly she never could care it. By that time music was stopped every one went to their respective room. Rahul is in peace and controlled state and slowly reading and waiting for the next message to arrive, he never cares or excited to write a reply immediately after Nisha's each message. After-all he has been waiting for this day from a long time and he must not loose his patience.
Study room was not latched meanwhile someone came touched her hand, she could feel Rahul's hand, some one kissed and she could feel Rahul's lips now and Some one hugged and She could feel Rahul's body warmth but the phone was still ringing she uttered Rahul saw the phone was ringing and it was from Rahul and the man beside was Sanju, she was shocked, beg her pardon and rushed to the bathroom and took a shower and left the room as soon as possible. Rahul didn't loose his patience atall till Nisha elaborate her adventurous act with a nicely articulated story. Afterwards she never meets Sanju anymore and they had a fight. She realised that She loves Rahul and She is for him she will be Rahul's forever. She never met neither would meet any of her friends anymore.Yes around five messages small and big which almost took two hours to reach Rahul's Mobile !!. With a big sigh of relief at last Rahul asked if the messages are over or still more. Nisha said its over. She didn't know that each message was a grief of shame which was definitely a lie to plot a new episode, which a common a normal IQ man or woman can easily guess which portion of the message could be true and lie.

Rahul as expected felt very relieved reading it and he realised it was the other day when he called her around 2 months back but Nisha was wrong in giving the right time in her narration which she said that it was just a week back. Rahul was not convinced it was 2 am 12.11.11. Rahul replied Nisha, he knew it already as he saw them a week back together roaming in the city and now they must end their friendship here as he feels he is surely in a trap. He has observed Nisha from the very first day of their meeting that She can't be trusted and he tried to tell her every other-day directly or indirectly but she never understood but she always insisted him to be with him as she loves him from her heart and her love for him was true. Nisha didn't hear. She had to take her God's swear again to convince him. Rahul couldn't convince himself everytime she swears in the name of God. He has to end he knew he has to stop here not anymore. He has already lost many of his valuable time in guiding her. He had been laughed by his friends in every dinner table for so long and not anymore. He can't tell the truth to anyone even. But atleast he can be out from this net. He can make his future life secure and safe and out of all these every day analysis and design complecation. He had replied some of her lies in the msg again to Nisha but she had her answers for every questions, she also promised and had promised that she would never meet her those childhood friends in her life. Rahul was sleepless that night. He couldn't forgive himself for forgetting his own values and own image and helping to an incorrigible female. Yes he can't get back it, he can't convince every other friend of him but he didn't miss to forward each message to Neeta to witness her too for the Nisha's act.

He now knows he had to prove it infront of Nisha though he saw Sanju with Nisha accidentally, one fine day just a week back near the park when Rahul said he was out seek and Nisha had a nice covering for that. It is not for him to escape or proove it is for Nisha to get away and leave him. So he planned on the 180th day he had to appear infront of Nisha. Since that day, Rahul was not speaking to Nisha anymore. Nisha calls him everyday Rahul never receives. Nisha texts everyday rahul never replies. That day she called manytimes but Rahul disconnected each call and She messaged mnay but Rahul didnt reply any of them. Rahul was infront of Nisha's office yes the same time just before 7 pm when she leaves to her home and then she goes for bath and then do puja and study and they talk only in message there after. It was the protocol they followed till their 180 days of friendship. Rahul sent a message to Nisha its over he is cool and she should leave for home now time to go. Nisha replied saying 'tears on her eyes atlast he spoke and he forgave her and she is very happy that day'. Rahul knew it that is the only way to let her out from office and replied a smile. Nisha was out from office She still didn't buy her helmet which she lost while shopping with her mom she said one fine day but Rahul guessed that she lost it in a pub along with the handbag which he gifted her on a return of a gift. Anyway he didn't bother too much about the helmet as Nisha's face was quite clear and she seems like prepared to go for a fashion trip which he saw from his eyes covered with his new helmet. He followed her Nisha parked her scooty in a near by shopping mall. Rahul stopped by and hided himself little far. Nisha parked the scooty and within a minute she went into the nearby car parked and went off. Rahul followed. Car parked near an apartment little far. Rahul didnt try to intervene. He sent a message if Nisha reached her home. Nisha replied "Yes Long back". Now Rahul didnt try to peep more but he came to the place where Nisha parked her bike to hear more lies. He came parked his bike and sent a message "what are you doing ?" now Nisha replied "Going to take bath !" gave a 30 minutes of pause for every message. Rahul was happy listening the every day protocol-ed message as she used to send earlier. Now after a while Rahul sent "long time bath !" a reply came "Studying :)". Rahul didn't ask many more questions. Long time after Rahul sent a message 'Since morning she called him many times but when he is cool now and speaking to her she is never replying apart from the usual thing" No reply another 30 minutes no reply. 9.30pm Car came dropped Nisha. Rahul hided again himself within his helmet. Nisha started her scooty and headed towards her house and mean while opened the phone it was the touch phone which Nisha was not using anymore as the screen was not working since longtime as per one of her explanation and she bought a new querty keypad phone cause Rahul likes querty! Rahul didn't bother anyway he forwarded all the messages to Neeta and asked her to be little more patient for a while when he will tell everything what he wanted to tell to her and what her childhood friend was doing with him. Anyway it was time to appear infront of Nisha. He hunked Nisha. Nisha stopped her bike, looked back couldn't realise him and then he removed the helmet glass and said hi with a cunning smile. Nisha was helpless, she ranway about 100 metters parking her bike, Rahul followed and stopped her and suddenly shamelessly many more words came out without her knowledge but the words were events which were already told by Nisha few days and weeks back. Rahul went near her and asked if the study was over and said her not to give any explanations and it should be the end from her side and left.

Nisha still called him sent some convincing messages. But Nisha till now never knew that by this time few of her male friends are now Rahul's casual friends and they are the one who confirmed of Nisha's earlier relationship with Chandan, Bhusan and also Sanju. Rahul smiled again and it was the last final smile for Nisha when Nisha was not around anymore. Rahul never looked back and blocked her phone number. He was happy and more happier now. He called neeta and told her all the story so far and also decided to stop the looping here after and wish her good luck and convey the best wishes to Nisha too. He never wanted to know if those were lies or truth. He was feeling the fresh air on the road in his bike a few kilometer with no hands on the handle yelling the song his favorite "Right there, keep it right there ..". He was light and thinking of a successful future ahead leaving all this emotions and attachment and the help !. He was crossing many lights in the dark and approaching his house. He didn't bother anymore to convince any one not even his friends. After all "Lies can't be Truth for Ever !".

Just a Link but worth sharing it

Why I’d rather be Anna than Arundhati

I am Anna. Are you ?

This is what is the noise every where now in indian streets, fields, Cars, Buses, Houses.

Noise !!! No its the holy word every indian is chanting. Roar is Louder, Roads are congested, fields are filled.. but our corrupt politicians are still wearing their blind glasses and the dumb headphones !! the politicians are counting the number of people in this movement, will it fizzle out yes it will they are betting on it.. huh..

Are you not corrupt ? Ohho only a non corrupt can chant this slogan !! !!No!!

Most of the person are into corruption at any point of time in their life for sure. Corruption has become an attitude of every person in a corrupted system. It is a definite form if people stay a long time in a corrupted system. Peoples mindset adheres and adapt the environment they behave differently when they are in India and US and England because the system guides them. Every one like to take easy way out but the capable with money and bureaucratic power take easier way out (following the shortcut path of curroption) but the middle class people or the lower middle class or the Aam admi suffers. Can't a PM do corruption ? but lets forget it. No No He should be forgiven. he has many responsibilities after all he has to run a great country a great party small small mistakes can happen !

Law is made in Vacuum ?? No its not it is made by the superman of the country, elected by you the people. You have elected us to represent you now its our duty and let us make it .. Ha Ha ha hurrr.. I know I didn't elect them I dint vote its the people who are mostly the uneducated mass the greedy mass of India which has taken part in the voting. Yes Yes some good and matured people also participated but the most educated and most matured dint take part but how can they ? most of them work outside far from their homeland and sufficient infrastructure is absent to help this big mass and the result is this bureaucracy monopolistic words. Do you say this time I will Vote .. Ohh No I can't believe it you have shown it for all 5 decades so far and you are kidding me now.

Some of the members of youngistan even ashamed of this crooked politics and our politicians which includes our most qualified PM who claims that who never addressed without reading a script and if at all he does it, he cant keep eye contact while addressing a gathering !! Alas ..

Its the youth of india now.. Rahul ? Where are you ? You seem to be the youth icon of India ? Youth are following Anna's path and looking for you to lead them ? Na Na Family business is more important for me now and PM is there to lead you and show you the right path guys. Don't misunderstand me please. may be an unheard voice and will be forgotten in near future ! He knows and the smart politician has used this funny sword and we the people of India are the greatest example for them who never learn and never learnt from past 5 decades.

I think the kids who might not even know what exactly is corruption in a larger democracy, but surely know that whole India is against corruption and support Anna Hazzare Movement and happy to swing the Indian Flag with their tiny hands in solidarity. The old men, the common man, the college student, government servants, the prisoners every one are out for a cause and that is support Anna Hazzare. wow what a nice way of rejecting the Govt Lokpal (people say it Jokepal), Bhajan at ramlila, yelling bande mataram, waving the National Flag millions of people rallies with a peace ful protest in every corner in the country. No one is there to control the crowed, Delhi witnessed 35% drop in crime last few days. May be Government is ready to see the opposite side of it which might happen in very near future if the correct version of Lokpal Bill is not introduced and team Anna fail ! Surely the people of India sensed it already and unite together in such fashion till the best Bill gets implemented.

You

When I hold your hand

it means every pain and lane

I will be your supporter man ..

When I walk holding your hand

it means living whole life in your way

sad, happy, dark, light in every way

in every corner of land.

When I kiss on your forehead it means

how much I care and How much I miss you.

When I kiss on your eyes it means

life is so beautiful when I see myself with you.

When I kiss on your cheek it means

I care you as my kid and life is so difficult without you.

When I kiss your lips it means

you are my guy and want to spend,

whole my life with no fight locking your lips just in silence.

When I kiss your neck it means

I want to breathe with you seducing you for romance

and cooperate with my feelings.

When I hug you it means

I am giving myself to you

Where every part of me

Belongs to you, respect you n trust you.

When I sleep on your chest means

am leaving all worries beside

and listening to your heart-beats by my name n only mine

listening to it, increases my confidence 

that you are my everything and whole world aside.

And

Nothing bothers, no fear, 

nothing..

just you and me together.

What happens when an apple falls ?

Yes its related to Newton's Law of gravity every one knows. But leaving about the scientific definition, John Travolata in "Phenomenon" Movie redefined it in a social and emotional way. It was touching and inspired me to write an emotional part of it which is again an experience in Rahul's Life my protagonist in this topic.

Last month I met my friend Rahul, This time he was little glummy not that greate smile in his face. Common Rahul what happened ? I remember..He use to tell about Lavanya, Yes his girl friend, his love he use to tell me how much he loves her, how he smiles having a glance at Lavanya, How he forgets all the pain he was carrying on his shoulders when he talks to Lavanya.

No it was one sided love may be i am wrong but it will soon be reveled. In reality they are friends between other friends but most of the time lavanya likes Rahul company and so does Rahul. But they are just friends like others but Rahul shares the secret with me and only me because he knows i can encrypt it 1024 bit. I insisted him to propose Lavanya but he couldn't. I know why ! He is a guy from Bhubansewar and a Bramhin and Lavanya.. u could guess I am sure. Rahul loves his mother a lot and to respect her wishes he was prepared to buy her a brahmin sober doll. So he studied hard to make a career far from attachments, emotions, attractions, infatuations, love or lust with any girls and now a SWE like me. He met Lavanya here through a common friend they became friends. Now Rahul doesn't have to make a career on an already made career so he is little light on girls but takes always careful step save him to keep his mothers wish.

Ok then why Lavanya didn't tell she loved him too ? I know her too, after all I am the common friend. She is also tied in her family rules and regulations she has got a very strict but loving family. I am sure she can sacrifice anything in front of this social regulations after all they have given her birth, fed her and turned her into such a beautiful girl with perfect talent. She has seen a very bad part of life in her past too. She has seen how their family has grown from rags to riches and how her mother supported her to study and made her stand on her feet. She definitely can't drown her parents wishes to marry her find a intra cast cocoon.

Anyway this is the story till now which i remembered before asking Rahul "what happend Rahul ?" He briefed his encounter with the Lavanya again. I can't be just friend to her. I don't know what would I do ? I said you guys always think of consequences and don't let your emotion or feeling come out of your golden caves. I know you both will live together (may not marry) even in another birth ! . But i really don't believe in new birth. I just don't believe in uncertain predictions. I believe in being happy live happily. Live each and every moment of the life thinking about the success and happiest part of the golden past. Don't forget to smile thinking about a sad consequence or the bad past. Why can't you guys think about the happy part of life. Why can't you guys think about sharing love or emotions even it is for a moment in your life. Why don't you live your that 2 days of your life so happily that you forget all the future of consequences or the Bad past. Why can't you think about the remembrance of the happiest time you spent with her or the most precious time you lived with her. Thinking about -- Ohh I have to keep my mother's wish, I can't ruin their faith on me, Ohh I can't hurt Lavanya ! -- you are just cheating yourself and loosing an unforgettable moment of life which would keep you happy in your old age remembering your encounter with Lavanya !

Actually I have said the same thing to Lavanya also sometime back when Rahul was not there but she has shown her girly attitude till now not been open up near Rahul her love. Its easy to say but difficult to implement for sure because human mind is programmed to work more on the sad part of life and they just get captured in the unforgettable part of mind but happiness is volatile that was her response. I had a quick response too, I am sure we can work on it and alter the pro-gramme and teach the brain to keep the happy part in its unforgettable storage and make us happy and left then the decision on her.

Love, Care, Feelings, Emotions are internal beauty of a human being. I think they have some balancing factor . which when is less in family or personal life they are fulfilled by others around. So its a usual phenomenon when people who are sad in family or their own personal life are easily fall prey of all these factors outside. But the religion the culture in India shows its ugly shine at the end and they have to let the apple fall in ground and eaten by bugs. So before it falls on ground eat it have it in your body so that it becomes the part of your body and you live with them till you die. May be many misunderstood Travolta's Dialog but I have delivered it to Rahul and Lavanya in my way, Let's wish for the happiness around them.

Beggars, Buggers and the Hinjras

It was obvious for me to expect a beautiful girl near my berth while travelling in Indian Rail like many of you. I don't know if the committed bachelors or the married have the same thoughts like me ! No it was a SLeeper Class berth, nothing to worry it was not my first time in SL class.. yes though its little odd when we compare the hygienic conditions in SL and AC. unhygenic ! yeah but I can compromise I told right it's not the first time for me :)

Anyway S8 and a middle berth seat I was assigned, it's ok. As I entered in to my cabin suddenly my eyes started looking for Her in the cabin, yeah its common being a bachelor I don't know if the single bachelor and the married have too the same thoughts ! but i was not lucky this time too. 3 bachelors of nearly my age out of them 2 on my side berths and another in the front berth. One Swamiji (Iskon follower) was sitting near him and one parents with their 3-4 years old Son on side berths. And a Girl near the window seat near Swamiji. The train whistled and started running and slowly gained the momentum. After few minutes giving a good smile to our fellow bachelor and the Swamiji we started talking about the usual topics like college and the journey and the purpose. The Girl didn't yet partcipate ! kammath was his name looks like a don't care guy on my front seat with a nikkar (tight half pant) and fcuk brand t-shirt, with his i-pod in his ears, he hardly participated in our discussions too. But surely the Kid was the 2nd fiddle and now the Kid too also gave cute smile to me. He was a good observer and a question bank, what is this why is this, where is this, there was also some yes/no questions with his broken and simple intelligence firing at his Father.

I liked Swamiji's talk on God, 4 Dhama in India, culture, religion the Kaliyug and 2012 end of it etc. It was quite interesting and Lavanya (what a sweet name !) the girl also joined now in my discussion with swamiji. One person with very dirty clothes, lame, uncombed hair looked like for more than years he didn't comb, how could he he had also broken fingers appeared and stood in front of our cabin and many of us offered cents to him. In the mean while the TTE with his black suit appeared and asked for ticket and the identification proof to every one and the tickets were signed by the TTE.

Now the kid asked his Father

what is this ? -- looking at the irctc ticket in his fathers right hand

It's a Ticket u need to buy it to travel in Train -- father said .

then What is this ? -- Son again

It's a photo identity Card -- father said, now the ticket is signed by TTE.

Son again, with his sweet murmur low voice pulled the Father's shirt and pointing to the dirty fellow asked who is this, TTE didn't ask ticket to him ? The father in his low voice a Begger doesn't need a ticket they don't have money !

Beggar's business works well in train because customers are more, one of our bachelor yelled with a smile !

Now one after the another station passes more and more beggers followed, begged, being offerred, but looking at their dirty dress and uncombed hairs the Kid is smart and knows now that they don't need ticket and photo identity card. We are still much involved in the Swamiji's stories and counter questions on religion and God. She started looking outside the window. One of our bachelor shows all most 12 teeths to another bachelor and told something in his ear. I was sure he gestured the body of the beauty. It was really much attractive with her tight jeans and v-neck t-shirt. Lavanya Pulled up her v-neck collar little up because I believe other bachelors sight was about to fall straight at her cleavage. Hope my fellow bachelors would have already measured it while we were in our discussion. Lavanya was already bit friendly and exchanged many arguments, laughs and smiley at me during our discussions.

Now two good looking woman with quite good physic and sharee appeared one in turmeric covered face and another escorting her and asking people to help her by offering money as she was an orphan and she is getting married soon. I wondered who was she then to her ?. I din't donate. One guy donated and now the Son again fired his question to the Father..

papa she also doesn't need a ticket because she is asking money ? wow what a smart boy he can now define beggar very well !

Yes she is a beggar -- Father

but she is not looking like a beggar, she is well dressed and yellow face ! -- Son (there is still a little confusion in his mind and now he wants to clarify from his father)

No response -- Father

Bugger's business also works well in train because customers are more , Kammath had quick response with a smile at the kid. I think now Kid is smart enough to identify a beggar and a bugger.

Train approached one station and stop for few minutes, started again. Swamiji again started You are born to do something good for this planet, keep it clean and green. God has created the most intelligent creature and the most complex system on earth the human after millions of years. He meant that dianosorous extincted 65million years ago but No human was there, Couldn't have God created Human at that time ? So Humans in last 2-3 hundred years polluted this world to such an extent that world is unstable now and its going to end by 2012. Yes I think Swamiji was right. Life is present in this earth from milions of years ago. There were gaint dianosorous also present in long past, God might have created this ultimate creature the Humans to end the world may be with an experimental purpose. Some boys with dirty cloths again started cleaning with the coach, no no not listening to Swamijis words but it is what is they do with their shirts and expecting some penny in return. we were generous now to offer some penny after all they are working and asking money it's ok. I think the Kid would have already noticed their work for money but where the railway cleaners gone ohh once in a 24 hour journey they appear and clean. most of their work is done by this passengers paid cleaners why do they have to I thought. Lavanya also aggreed on swamijis words. We are now more comfortable with each other.

Suddenly a peculiar sound was heard. Everyone.. but more of our bachelors became cautious and try to clearly hear the sound if it was a hoax. But now the sound was clear to be a clap but the unique ness of the clap was too clear to tell us that it was the Hinjra's (eunuch) sign or warning what ever you can say. Our bachelor unit was now too much concerned another 2 bachelor saw each other and started unwinding each other. One jumped up the upper berth another ran out towards the toilet and kammath was unaffected didn't care it, he was busy in his music. The parents, kid, Swamiji including Lavanya also didn't feel of any risk. I had to act prude in front of others after all running away is like an immaturity. One black strong, fat and the stout Hinjra appeared before us with another leanly built woman acting like hinjra. I can't explain it but anyone could confirm that she was not a Hinjra still she accompanied them. But this time one hand pulling already half of the sharee from the left leg and in the right hand pointing me said the Hinjra "eee chikne de re .." Then I acted as if I didn't hear or seen them. she came closer pulling up the sharee more and now the sound was more louder "eee Chikne suna nehi kya paisa dee rreee ...." I denied now and now Hinjara came near me removed my spec and pulled some of my well combed hairs and pressed my chin and murmured some unimaginable words and left me throwing my spec on my lap. Hinjra now went near Kammath, he smiled. Hinjra said "ee Hero paisa de rree" with a smile. Now Hinjra used the left hand for some other purpose. It just went on to kammath's holy cross ohh shit.. it started measuring its length surely because in his nikkar it was little prominent. Then the Hinjra smiled at kammath and in his right hand squizzed kammath's teat. This shameless guy really didn't care anything rather gave a nice smile at the Hinjra and the Hinjra gave a kiss to this lucky Guy with a nice smile and left off.

In the mean while the Kid fired his questions again to his much talented Father

papa who is them, he is very fat and wearing sharee, put lipstik also- May be doesn't know yet that was a Hinjra ! but kid still says 'he'

Shsuuuuuu -- Father with his finger on his lips because Hinjra might hear and mind his Son

Son didn't stop

You know he has lot of money in his small wallet, he is very rich, still he is asking money ?

He also doesn't need ticket or photo identity card ?

No -- Father said

And now he has no talent but just one 'No' word to explain to his good kid that they are eunuch, Hinjra's business also works well in train because customers are more.

Every one was so silent till the nearest next station. I couldn't even face Lavanya's face for some time, she was busy in her out window explorations. Our another bachelor was laughing at me and kammath was happy hiding up and started telling some other glories but before he saluted kammath for his measured length silently. We arrived the next station Lavanya stood up collected her belongings and got down. Looked at me but I was uneasy still to say bye because I wasn't prepared even to leave her, we haven't yet shared anything personal. But now could manage to say bye but forgot to ask her number or contacts. I missed one beautiful encounter, it could have been led to a greater relation, all my imaginations got buried. Swamiji asked me to lodge a complain in the next station against these Hinjra for harassment or he insisted me to write a letter to our Railway Minister.

Train started Lavanya's face disappeared from the train window. And I could hear our another bachelor's angry voice from the toilet "Who the bloody dick ?, That mother fucker shit in side the toilet giving a signature, what a fuck man there is a latrin inside but that bloody fucker, rascal has shit on the side of it. ohh shit, fuck fuckk fuuckk, Ohh God when these Buggers will learn ethics, clenlyness !! ". I haven't heard so many f* words in a sentence so far. Thank God Lavanya has left otherwise it would be one more shameful moment.

I didn't lodge a complain in the next station but promised Swamiji that I would write a letter to our Railway Minister. Till now I haven't written it !! Don't know when I will write about my Indian Rail Sleeper Class S8 Coach experience with those unidentified and without ticket beggars, buggers and Hinjras.

Dog's smile

Like every day we were walking back from the munekolal Galli, Tarini hotel finishing our delicious cheap dinner served by the descent Deepu, which saves our a lot of valuable time in the journey of our professional busy Soft Ware Engineer life in overpopulated Bangalore and had a glimpse on the dog, yes the same doggy who was lying in front of Kichhukhan hotel from last 2 days stretching her 4 legs upto what she could covering 1/4 th of the road with her lazy sleep. I asked Ketan look at the same doggy as if she has not slept for years she is sleeping here her last sleep without any tention and the poor trafic takes a c turn to save her peaceful sleep. And every one started laughing. If a man would have done it, it is the drunken for sure which is very common in bangalore . A social worker would not also come for help if it is a man lying on the road side because it is very common in bangalore and still the traffic would take a c turn without disturbing his insensible road sense.

And then few more dogs were barking, uhunnn talking to each other with their

who hoo huuu language, ohh they are discussing about the weekend party, their date and some delicious bones. One dog was sitting near the bakery yelling out its tongue with a very good smile at us. I said how dogs can smile most of the time wow !!. They are the stray dogs they are the happiest Ketan said with a smile. I said do you think the pet dogs are sad ? No he said they are the luckiest and happiest animals in the world. They eat free, get love free, care free, bath free and **** also free and smiled again. I understood it correctly. Yes after all Dog is the Most trusted dumb animal but still the frequently pronounced slang in india is named after this animal because it is most exploited animal too. Its Concluded that all most all the dogs are happy.

What Every Young Indian Thinks About Apart From Sex

It was the day of Final The long awaited world cup Cricket Finale ! every one yes i mean it every one skipped the dinner to watch it Live. I also could not hold my self watching the last Dhoni Shot but ofcourse I enjoyed my Dinner at Tarini Hotel with peace of mind because I am not at all crazy about Cricket and the hotel was almost starving as hardly anyone hungry was there today !! .

I remember the Morning news paper where Anna Hazare was on his fast for the Jan Lokpal Bill which will be used as a sword against Corruption. I was happy that day that someone an aam admi sees a future Non-Corrupted India at least in his dream and he is ignited now to make his dream success of course few more joined in his dream too. Match is over India had a greate victory defeating Srilanka. Suddenly lots of congratulations SMS hit my mobile. There was big roar as if there was a bomb blast then followed by Bharat Mata Ki .... jai.... very clear till 1 kilometer long decibel sound, Bande ... Matarammmm ... !!. Wow at-last our young, I mean the middle aged young showed their middle aged patriotism at midnight. What a Josh !!! Every Indian blood was boiling. Aftermath of Mumbai Blast, the big CWG and 2G Scam and Anna Hazare also couldn't hear such an unequivocal-ism during his fight for his national dream. Yes Oldies are ignited and the youth are still in sleep.

Recently I had the same argument with one of my fellow colleague in my office after our lunch sitting near the exit gate, yeah it is the best place to be noted and notice the curvy figures. So the topic was why most of Indian are crazy about cricket and not anything else ? why not the biggest young mass has no boiling blood ? And the answer came out to be : India is the land of culture, religion, middle class and lower middle class, the aam admi. This is a land of lots of troubles and hurdles. Life is not as easy as in the developed countries. Time is not so precious as it is in the developed countries. Entertainment, Love, Sex which is most important units of a happy human-being is not easy as it is in the developed countries. People have to struggle a lot for a healthy and peaceful life amidst its rich religion and cultural values. Students have to struggle a lot to pass the exam, unemployed has to fight a lot to get a job and Cricket helps here the biggest unhappy mass to add some masala into their life. They smile now with each run, smile more with each 4 and laugh with each 6 an Indian beats and bats. It quenches the Hunger of a poor with each Indian victory. It satisfies a Single from his boredom's life with each run India runs. It gives a cheers to the struggling Unemployed with each wicket an Indian takes. The discussion was bit lengthy and I am not totally convinced but I think more than 50% will definitely support my friends argument.

On my way back to my workstation few thoughts started smoking in my inner minds ... in India cricket has really become an emotional game ! If IPL is Cricket cum entertainment, why can't we use this for national integrity. Millions of people watching cricket finale that day could have sought a word not against corruption but against ourself to be honest and transparent and relieve our responsibility positively and sincerely. May be for a minute like how they danced with joy and madness celebrating the success whole night disturbing the newly born baby and the old man's peace sleep. Can't we take cricket as a opportunistic field for the success of nation ! I saw a couple near the steps and the guy was repeating agar aap dil se kuchh bhi chaho to puri kayanat use aap se milane ki dua karta hai. Hey hey it was Shaharukh khan's dialogue from 'Om Shanti Om'.

Then I lost in my thoughts of - What every man thinks about apart from sex - in India like country !

Am I really in the so called Secular India

when i introspect the main page of almost all news papers, i can't but help musing in thoughts of the future india reserved for the socially backward classes. I dont say we should not uplift the socially backward class but i want them to be properly identified and defined.Caste is not a yardstick for measuring the backward ness.
And if such mathematics will be applied to the developing india i suspect the accelaration and momentum of growth interms of quality and social prosperity too.

I dont find any place for a simple human being like me.What about you??

I always was proud of being a citizen of the democratic, secular india.
Now i can see the devided india first by relegion , second by communities, third by minorities, and at last now with caste.Still i dont stop being proud of the socially devided india.Do you feel so??

I really want to give many many thanks to the current civilisation to choose such power crunchers, the head of monopolistics politicians, who better knows the constitutional laws and too know how to use it in win win way.When i see the medicos strikes and students strike almost all corner of the secular india, i can realise that there is a root cause.The root cause lies with us.This kind of playing game of politics on socity is going to happen every time if we will not know the root cause and i will identify Voting which is a process to elect a leader.If we scrutinies properly we can find that only 30-40% of the people vote and harldly the educated mass participate in this process and that is the main cause so we(educated mass) suffer as a consequence.Ask your self when did u vote last time.So we have to come up with solution to fulfill 100% voting.We can make the difference if we succeed.We have a lot of solution for this but initiaion is required.I want you to participate and cooperation in this race too.